A Message from Rabbi Sharon Kleinbaum and Rabbi Ayelet S. Cohen on the Senate Vote on Marriage

December 2, 2009

Today, our community experienced a loss. We lost the vote-marriage equality will not pass in New York State in 2009. We know many of us have fought tirelessly in hope of achieving the recognition, the rights, and the respect of New York for our relationships and the relationships of our loved ones. We have given our time, our money, our voice, our bodies, and our very spirit to this cause. We had so much to look forward to, not the least of which would have been the countless ceremonies and professions of love that would have taken place in our CBST community. It is, without doubt, a tremendous loss.

Yet at the same time, as painful as it is, we wonder what silver lining we can find in this. Maybe it's naïve, but in some ways, we think we actually achieved something tremendous today. When the Israelites were at the Red Sea with the Egyptians at their heels, waiting for a miracle, one man, Nachshon stepped into the water so that it reached his ankles. The water did not split. Nachshon walked further, and the water reached his waist. Still, the water did not split. Nachshon walked further yet, and the water was at his neck. Still, the water did not split. It was not until the water was at Nachshon's nostrils that the Red Sea was divided for the Israelites to travel to safety and liberation.

At this point, we may feel as we imagine Nachshon did when the water was at his nostrils, terrified of drowning with no hope in sight. Like Nachshon, we must keep walking forward, knowing that the Red Sea will indeed split when it is ready. Unlike Nachshon, we are not waiting for divine intervention. We must look to our communities to support each other as we continue to walk through the Read Sea, fighting for liberation.

Also, marriage equality in New York is not our only sea to cross. Just this week, we achieved the first step for marriage equality in Washington D.C., adding it to the list with Massachusetts, Iowa, Vermont, and Connecticut. This was practically unthinkable ten years ago, with the water at our ankles. Even here in New York, we recently had a victory that made name changes for transgender folks easier. And on the marriage front, same-sex marriages from other states are now recognized in New York. And we are still fighting for the Dignity for All Students Act and the Gender Non-Discrimination Act in New York.

It may seem like the Red Sea may never split. The water is cold and the sun isn't even shining; crossing the Red Sea is no day at the beach. We will march on, and unlike Nachshon, we are not marching alone with thousands of Israelites waiting behind us. We have each other. Together, we will cross the Red Sea and all others that come before us.

L'shalom,
Rabbi Sharon Kleinbaum
Rabbi Ayelet S. Cohen